Frustrated

I might have mentioned this before but I am a very impatient person.  If I want something done, I want it done yesterday.  If you're not going to do it as quickly as I think it should be done, I would just as soon do it myself.  I don't mind doing whatever it is that needs to be done. In fact, in most cases, I would prefer to do it myself if I can get it done sooner than you ;)

That is the reason that Spencer got a picture of me trying to start the chainsaw.  My crepe myrtle needed to be pruned and I wanted it done right then.  Could I wait until Brad got home?  No, of course not.

I think Brad "fixed" it to where I would never be able to start it on my own.  Spencer said Dad was a smart man.

My impatience applies to all areas but especially to the medical issues with Spencer.  My thinking is that if you attended school for umpteen years for your specific specialty, then you should be able to tell me exactly what is wrong when I present you with a problem.  Today's problem was the fact that Spencer has been having headaches, vision problems and sensitivity to light for the past three weeks.  I have been trying to figure out a "reason" for these symptoms but came to the conclusion yesterday that it could be his VP shunt, which he has had since he was three years old.  His shunt circulates his spinal fluid through his brain and prevents it from building up. I really did think that his shunt was malfunctioning and causing his problems.

So today, after six hours at Children's, a CT scan of his brain plus x-rays of his shunt, we are being told that his symptoms are NOT a cause of a malfunctioning shunt but we don't know what is the cause.  Dr. Ojal said to wait two to three months to see if the symptoms resolve on their own and if they don't, come to see her.  Um, no.  I will give it a week or two and if he is not better then we will be back.  Ugh.  All I want are definitive answers.

The Old Wise One, a/k/a Spencer, reminded me that we don't always get definitive answers when it comes to his medical issues and to just relax and let God be in control.  It really irritates me sometimes that my 17-year-old is more wise than I am.

I want a plan for getting Spencer well.  I want a plan for either returning to LA or bringing Cole home to Arkansas.  I want a plan for world peace.  Somehow, I don't foresee any answers in my immediate future.

  "Answer my prayers, O Lord, for your unfailing love is wonderful.  Turn and take care of me, for your mercy is so plentiful."

~Psalm 70:16